Current thoughts:
1. I deserve better
2. Someone, please take it from here
3. It was something I HAD to do, not something I WANTED to do
4. Animal farm is insane
5. Dgaf
6. Graduation
7. Plants, wait... No plantalones.
8. "I Wanna Be"
9. The Notebook type thang.
10. Put you to bed
11. Laptop and new camera?! (:
12. V Generation
13. Availability
14. Love letter
15. Creepy letter
16. Twitter
17. Admiration from afar
18. College
19. First Love
20. And every time you think of me I wanna blow your mind.
21. Fuck it's hard. ):
22. He had it, then I had it all, then I had it, then I ended it, then he had it, and now I have nothing.
23. Someone NEEDS to stop.
24. Chen on speaker
25. Plans that won't ever be
26. BA's coming here soon!
27. Words can only go so far
28. You scare me
29. WE scare me
30. Baby's first basketball practice tomorrow?
31. Jon Jon?!
32. Puberty presentation
33. Choir banquet on Friday!
34. Take A Chance On Me
35. Last Late Start?!
36. Sick ):
37. Self taught life and love lessons
38. Lol, 2nd pony flag of May. -__-
39. " Yeah! I'm psycho!... I mean psychic."
40. Replacement girl
41. Shady!
42. Thanks
43. This is for my ex's
44. No TV = a dark, noiseless room ):
45. Almost by Jennifer Chung
I must admit...
It's quite an extraordinary feeling, still.
In and out, just as it's always been.
This is us.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Anatomy
Hello. Today is quite an interesting day.
I'm in anatomy right now, sitting in the library. I'm bored as hell. Ian, Nessa, and I decided to do our presentation on puberty. We wanted in vitro fertilization, but it didn't work out. We kind of wanted something easier I guess. Everyone's doing STDs and schizophrenia. Haha. Lame. Anyway, the bell is about to ring. I'll finish this later, fsho.
Take it easy.
I'm in anatomy right now, sitting in the library. I'm bored as hell. Ian, Nessa, and I decided to do our presentation on puberty. We wanted in vitro fertilization, but it didn't work out. We kind of wanted something easier I guess. Everyone's doing STDs and schizophrenia. Haha. Lame. Anyway, the bell is about to ring. I'll finish this later, fsho.
Take it easy.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Harsh Realization
Random Thoughts:
1. You are too complicated.
2. You are insatiable.
3. I've got you figured out. You're not fooling me.
4. You disgust me terribly.
5. You don't have any idea about what you want.
6. I'm NOT diggin' you/us.
Dear you,
I don't see how anyone could have exactly what they want in front of them and insist on having less? They're practically being served, but it's never enough. Never. It's absurd how insatiable some people can be. How people mistreat you when all you were trying to do was be there, love them unconditionally, and respect them for what they want and don't want. How can someone have what they've always wanted, but hide it from the world? How?! I don't get it. Why hide? Why front? Where does it get you? You hide because you're scared and you're a wuss. You're afraid of the pain or even of the good feeling that someone can give you. You hide because you don't want anyone to know. You hide to remain attainable yet completely unattainable. You front because you wanna be hard, you want what you want, get what you want, hide it from the world, rinse and freaking repeat. This gets you back to where you were, but worse. You ultimately WILL end up alone. You WILL end up insecure. You WILL live in regret. You WILL end up unsatisfied. You ARE alone. You ARE insecure. You ARE living in regret. You ARE unsatisfied.
You're come and you go. You return and you leave.
I won't come. I won't return.
I'll go. And I'll leave.
Dear you,
You are missed.
Dear you,
Shady ):
Dear you,
Thank you.
Dear you,
What the hell are you doing?!
Dear Val,
I love your guts. We get each other and it's fucking amazing. Bluntness is key right now. And it's all good to be bitchy. Trust. (: I gotchu.
Dear EVERYONE,
Chill the fuck out. (excuse my foul language)
1. You are too complicated.
2. You are insatiable.
3. I've got you figured out. You're not fooling me.
4. You disgust me terribly.
5. You don't have any idea about what you want.
6. I'm NOT diggin' you/us.
Dear you,
I don't see how anyone could have exactly what they want in front of them and insist on having less? They're practically being served, but it's never enough. Never. It's absurd how insatiable some people can be. How people mistreat you when all you were trying to do was be there, love them unconditionally, and respect them for what they want and don't want. How can someone have what they've always wanted, but hide it from the world? How?! I don't get it. Why hide? Why front? Where does it get you? You hide because you're scared and you're a wuss. You're afraid of the pain or even of the good feeling that someone can give you. You hide because you don't want anyone to know. You hide to remain attainable yet completely unattainable. You front because you wanna be hard, you want what you want, get what you want, hide it from the world, rinse and freaking repeat. This gets you back to where you were, but worse. You ultimately WILL end up alone. You WILL end up insecure. You WILL live in regret. You WILL end up unsatisfied. You ARE alone. You ARE insecure. You ARE living in regret. You ARE unsatisfied.
You're come and you go. You return and you leave.
I won't come. I won't return.
I'll go. And I'll leave.
Dear you,
You are missed.
Dear you,
Shady ):
Dear you,
Thank you.
Dear you,
What the hell are you doing?!
Dear Val,
I love your guts. We get each other and it's fucking amazing. Bluntness is key right now. And it's all good to be bitchy. Trust. (: I gotchu.
Dear EVERYONE,
Chill the fuck out. (excuse my foul language)
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Recently
Goodmorning, Bloggers!
I woke up rather early this morning to get a head start on my plans for this weekend. I am currently at my orthodontist's office, waiting for my sister in the car. I am also wearing my retainer, which is my muse for the morning. (: my sister and I are planning on a little bonding time this morning--if you want to call it that, and yeah! This weekend is going to be slightly hectic for me, but I can handle. I've been piled up with projects, presentations, homework, portolios--you know, the works, but the reality to this is that everyone has a lot to do nowadays and it's had to find yourself with free time. My goal for the weekend and the rest of my snior year is to maximize my time as much as possible, give 200% effort, and staight up go with the flow. I'm the type who needs definite and exct answers immediately, but I'm going to change that for the next few weeks. And, if my new methods turn out to go well, then I'll continue it through the summer and so on and so forth. I'm blogging from my iPhone so please excuse my typos. (:
Anyway, I think that I may have a few plans today, but let's talk about the plans that I have completed within the past few days.
Wednesday:
Last jazz rehearsal. I'll admit that I already miss it. Preparing for the last jazz concert is hitting me slowly day by day. It's hard for me to show emotions about not being in jazz anymore, but that's only because it hasn't smacked me across the face yet. Anyway, jazz rehearsal was okay, from what I remember. Encountered the usual annoyances, heard the mistakes, made silly mistakes, and sought to sound and perform better. I don't remember what I did after, so no comment on that.
Thursday:
I had plans for thurdsy, but like it has been recently, things don't work out as planned. I ended up going to work after dropping off Ryan Galo and Mevin from 4-5:30. Just for inventory and censoring stuff. I then met up with Galo and Merbs to chill and eat at coconut bay and chill at the park for a bit. We played ball with Merbs' brother, Mark, and conversated lightly. I then headed home and, as usual, knocked out sicklike. Good day, good day. Galo and Merbs are actually petty tight and we're all comfy talking about anything (:
Side note: I've been spending time with and talking a lot with Juco. It's pretty tight. We talk about everything and anything. (:
Friday:
Missy day! Went to school, did the usual, texted, talked, blah blah. After school, I met up with Missybaby at the mall, talked to Leah, and headed to Guppies. We spent our time barely eating and mostly talking about our lives, boys, and how things have been. It was great talking with her cause we're always on the same page and we never cease to express whatever may be on our minds. It was great. So side we carpooled to Guppies, Missy dropped me off at my car at the mall. After getting in my car and moving around a few things, I think I headed home and picked up my sister.
Today:
I woke up really early, for no reason at all. Since my morning plans were cancelled, I took my sister to her Orthodontist appointment. This leads me to where I'm at right now. I'm in my car, listening to music, waiting for my sister. Something just came up. So I may so something after I shower when I get home. I'll update about the rest of my day later.
I woke up rather early this morning to get a head start on my plans for this weekend. I am currently at my orthodontist's office, waiting for my sister in the car. I am also wearing my retainer, which is my muse for the morning. (: my sister and I are planning on a little bonding time this morning--if you want to call it that, and yeah! This weekend is going to be slightly hectic for me, but I can handle. I've been piled up with projects, presentations, homework, portolios--you know, the works, but the reality to this is that everyone has a lot to do nowadays and it's had to find yourself with free time. My goal for the weekend and the rest of my snior year is to maximize my time as much as possible, give 200% effort, and staight up go with the flow. I'm the type who needs definite and exct answers immediately, but I'm going to change that for the next few weeks. And, if my new methods turn out to go well, then I'll continue it through the summer and so on and so forth. I'm blogging from my iPhone so please excuse my typos. (:
Anyway, I think that I may have a few plans today, but let's talk about the plans that I have completed within the past few days.
Wednesday:
Last jazz rehearsal. I'll admit that I already miss it. Preparing for the last jazz concert is hitting me slowly day by day. It's hard for me to show emotions about not being in jazz anymore, but that's only because it hasn't smacked me across the face yet. Anyway, jazz rehearsal was okay, from what I remember. Encountered the usual annoyances, heard the mistakes, made silly mistakes, and sought to sound and perform better. I don't remember what I did after, so no comment on that.
Thursday:
I had plans for thurdsy, but like it has been recently, things don't work out as planned. I ended up going to work after dropping off Ryan Galo and Mevin from 4-5:30. Just for inventory and censoring stuff. I then met up with Galo and Merbs to chill and eat at coconut bay and chill at the park for a bit. We played ball with Merbs' brother, Mark, and conversated lightly. I then headed home and, as usual, knocked out sicklike. Good day, good day. Galo and Merbs are actually petty tight and we're all comfy talking about anything (:
Side note: I've been spending time with and talking a lot with Juco. It's pretty tight. We talk about everything and anything. (:
Friday:
Missy day! Went to school, did the usual, texted, talked, blah blah. After school, I met up with Missybaby at the mall, talked to Leah, and headed to Guppies. We spent our time barely eating and mostly talking about our lives, boys, and how things have been. It was great talking with her cause we're always on the same page and we never cease to express whatever may be on our minds. It was great. So side we carpooled to Guppies, Missy dropped me off at my car at the mall. After getting in my car and moving around a few things, I think I headed home and picked up my sister.
Today:
I woke up really early, for no reason at all. Since my morning plans were cancelled, I took my sister to her Orthodontist appointment. This leads me to where I'm at right now. I'm in my car, listening to music, waiting for my sister. Something just came up. So I may so something after I shower when I get home. I'll update about the rest of my day later.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
I wanna blow your mind
I wanna be your sky,
So blue and high.
And everytime you think of me,
I wanna blow your mind.
Hello blogger world!
Haha kidding. Hello, I'm currently hahahappy again. But ok guessing that's always good to hear, right? (: yeah. Genuine happiness is my main priority right now, mosdef. (:
Anyways, I'm currently on the phone with Mr. Benedict Anthony. I'm really tired but probably not as tired as him, because this cool guy worked overtime today. :o ha my tiredness probably doesn't even compare to his. Although, I was up all night last night because I was working on my statistics portfolio which I effed up. Haha a usual Lalique type move.
I posted this blog without finishing. My bad. Bahaha. But here it goes.
So blue and high.
And everytime you think of me,
I wanna blow your mind.
Hello blogger world!
Haha kidding. Hello, I'm currently hahahappy again. But ok guessing that's always good to hear, right? (: yeah. Genuine happiness is my main priority right now, mosdef. (:
Anyways, I'm currently on the phone with Mr. Benedict Anthony. I'm really tired but probably not as tired as him, because this cool guy worked overtime today. :o ha my tiredness probably doesn't even compare to his. Although, I was up all night last night because I was working on my statistics portfolio which I effed up. Haha a usual Lalique type move.
I posted this blog without finishing. My bad. Bahaha. But here it goes.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Midnight Serenade
Goodmorning world! Haha, once again, I have woken up happily to the sunshine. Sorry if I sound corny and stuff, but I cannot seem to get over this feeling.
So the rest of my day yesterday was chill. I fell asleep early again, which is funny that I tend to do that now. I then woke up around 10:30 again and pretty much stayed up till 1 O'clock or so. I spend my night conversating with significant others like Valerie bebeh. T'was a heartfelt conversation, no joke. We get each other like we're joined at the mind. It's nice. I happily fell asleep around 1 and yeah! Now I'm awake.
I woke up to a text from BA saying goodmorning and such. I've been texting him all morning, while I've been walking around, doing pilates, and downloading music. The past four days have been great. I hope there's more in store for me today. (: Not sure about my plans for later, but I'm going to have fun at any cost! So yeah! I'm gonna leave morning blog with a view videos and such.
Btw, I'm back in the flow and swang o' thangs. It feels good.
Ta ta for now. I'll update about my day tonight. (:
Absolutely breath-taking.
One commenter was right when s/he said "More intimate than sex."
Word to that.
So the rest of my day yesterday was chill. I fell asleep early again, which is funny that I tend to do that now. I then woke up around 10:30 again and pretty much stayed up till 1 O'clock or so. I spend my night conversating with significant others like Valerie bebeh. T'was a heartfelt conversation, no joke. We get each other like we're joined at the mind. It's nice. I happily fell asleep around 1 and yeah! Now I'm awake.
I woke up to a text from BA saying goodmorning and such. I've been texting him all morning, while I've been walking around, doing pilates, and downloading music. The past four days have been great. I hope there's more in store for me today. (: Not sure about my plans for later, but I'm going to have fun at any cost! So yeah! I'm gonna leave morning blog with a view videos and such.
Btw, I'm back in the flow and swang o' thangs. It feels good.
Ta ta for now. I'll update about my day tonight. (:
Absolutely breath-taking.
One commenter was right when s/he said "More intimate than sex."
Word to that.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Looking Up
Things are looking up! (:
Thursday, May 14, 2009:
Spring Show 2009! My last time performing at a Spring Show at Nogales High School. This didn't hit me at all until the spirit/energy circle that we did before performing. A lot of people who I really care about came to support us--Valerie, Michael, Ridge, my sister's non-choir friends, my mom, my brother, Ace Barro, choir parents, and many more. It was great. The first half was classical, while the second half was more contemporary pertaining to the theme of "Love and Heartache". I performed two numbers that night. I was the second soloist of the second act. Accompanied by Jesmond, I sang Jennifer Chung's original song, Almost. It actually went a lot better than I expected, which is great (: I also sang my duet with Mister David Haig--Elvis' Can't Help Falling in Love and Sixpence None The Richer's Kiss Me. That was rather cutesy. (: Bahah. Anyway, the Senior Rose Ceremony was great, along with the video made by Val too! Thank you Kathleen and Valerie, seriously. You guys did a lot for the seniors. (: The roses were beautifully hand-decorated. Loved it! Haha. Anyway, I gave my 4 roses to Valerie, Pitrizz, Dominic, and my Mommabear. T'was cutesy agains. After the concert, Valerie, Ace, and I drove a select few over to Denny's and ate there. It was really great, seriously. We all felt reunited with a few new additions too! Alright anyway, after dinner, I dropped off Jesmond and Fawzi at their houses and headed home. The night ended greatly. I ended up getting home around 12 something. I don't remember but it doesn't matter. My night was great. (:
Friday, May 15, 2009:
I didn't go to school because I'm a rebel. Lol, naw I just couldn't go to the carnival because of a few discrepancies. It was complicated and everything was cleared, but not perfectly. Anyway, I started off my morning great. Haha, two days in a row?! Yessir, and it's been awesome. Anyway I took my sister to school around 6:45, and took my brother to school around 7:50. Sometime in the morning, I talked to Ace and headed over to his house to go to Valerie's house. Haha, he decided to drive to save my gas so we went over to Val's. We found out that we were gonna go pick up Fawzi and go to The Village for some Chipotle and Cold Stone. Haha, we had a great time. Val and I both exclaimed "Things are looking up," which was kinda cute. Bahaha, but it's true! We've been great lately and we like like like it! So YEAH! Ace treated me for Chipotle and I bought him his Coffee Lovers Only, and we went back to Val's. Fawzi, Val, Ace and I watched Twilight. It was pretty cutesy, but BA was right that it's more for 12-14 year olds than 18 year olds. It was still cute and really nice to just chill again tho. (: Anyway, Ace had work at 5:30 so we had to leave Val's house around 4 so he could get ready and so I could pick up my car, pick up my sister, and head home. So we went over to Ace's, I picked up my car, left, picked up my sister, talked a lot at Joghurt, and finally went home! Everything was pretty chill. Talked to BA about a lot of stuff, and eventually fell asleep. Around 10 I woke up to my co-worker, Andrew's, call. He was just concerned about the fact that I never called him one day when I said I would and we haven't seen each other since that day. Haha, it was nice of him to check up on me tho. Anyway, sometime around 10, Ace happened call and was on his way home when he decided to visit. Since my dad wasn't home, I asked my mom if he could come for a while and she was chill about it. Ace chilled at my house and we talked for like an hour or two, and he decided to go home. We sang a few songs, talked about our day, and ate strawberries. I then pasteled a few things after he left and went to sleep after a while. Great way to end a night again! Sweeeeeeeeet. (:
Saturday, May 16, 2009:
I woke up this morning, happily. Haha. I took a shower and went to Albertson's. I spent my morning conversating, running errands, and being happy. My sister, my brother, Chen, and I went over to an ice skating rink in Anaheim. (: It was my first time at an ice skating rink. It was tight tho! I got the hang of it 'cause I wasn't as scared as I was making myself think I was. Bahaha, so yeah. After skating for two hours, the kiddies and I headed back to West Covina. We dropped off Chen and went to buy my grandpa his Whopper Jr. and Frech Fries at Burger King. We then went home and now I'm here! Happy as can be! Hahaha.
By the way, being this happy slightly annoys me because I don't understand why I'm all of a sudden so energetic and I just seem to be bouncing off the walls. Harhar, maybe I'm just silly. So yeah, I finally updated! Harhar.
This song is stuck in my head:
Horoscope for Today:
Capricorn
You might want to reassert your control by downshifting for the curves ahead. You may even think about using the emergency brake to bring everything to a temporary standstill. Unfortunately, neither of these tactics will likely bring you the stability you seek. Furthermore, they could throw you into an unmanageable skid as your life seems to spin out of control. Fortunately, you are in no danger now if you simply go with the flow.
Simple thangs, chill hang outs, reminiscing, staying up, talk talk talking, little thangs.
And I'm doing just fine.
I seem to be back in the swang o' thangs! (:
Things are looking up.
Thursday, May 14, 2009:
Spring Show 2009! My last time performing at a Spring Show at Nogales High School. This didn't hit me at all until the spirit/energy circle that we did before performing. A lot of people who I really care about came to support us--Valerie, Michael, Ridge, my sister's non-choir friends, my mom, my brother, Ace Barro, choir parents, and many more. It was great. The first half was classical, while the second half was more contemporary pertaining to the theme of "Love and Heartache". I performed two numbers that night. I was the second soloist of the second act. Accompanied by Jesmond, I sang Jennifer Chung's original song, Almost. It actually went a lot better than I expected, which is great (: I also sang my duet with Mister David Haig--Elvis' Can't Help Falling in Love and Sixpence None The Richer's Kiss Me. That was rather cutesy. (: Bahah. Anyway, the Senior Rose Ceremony was great, along with the video made by Val too! Thank you Kathleen and Valerie, seriously. You guys did a lot for the seniors. (: The roses were beautifully hand-decorated. Loved it! Haha. Anyway, I gave my 4 roses to Valerie, Pitrizz, Dominic, and my Mommabear. T'was cutesy agains. After the concert, Valerie, Ace, and I drove a select few over to Denny's and ate there. It was really great, seriously. We all felt reunited with a few new additions too! Alright anyway, after dinner, I dropped off Jesmond and Fawzi at their houses and headed home. The night ended greatly. I ended up getting home around 12 something. I don't remember but it doesn't matter. My night was great. (:
Friday, May 15, 2009:
I didn't go to school because I'm a rebel. Lol, naw I just couldn't go to the carnival because of a few discrepancies. It was complicated and everything was cleared, but not perfectly. Anyway, I started off my morning great. Haha, two days in a row?! Yessir, and it's been awesome. Anyway I took my sister to school around 6:45, and took my brother to school around 7:50. Sometime in the morning, I talked to Ace and headed over to his house to go to Valerie's house. Haha, he decided to drive to save my gas so we went over to Val's. We found out that we were gonna go pick up Fawzi and go to The Village for some Chipotle and Cold Stone. Haha, we had a great time. Val and I both exclaimed "Things are looking up," which was kinda cute. Bahaha, but it's true! We've been great lately and we like like like it! So YEAH! Ace treated me for Chipotle and I bought him his Coffee Lovers Only, and we went back to Val's. Fawzi, Val, Ace and I watched Twilight. It was pretty cutesy, but BA was right that it's more for 12-14 year olds than 18 year olds. It was still cute and really nice to just chill again tho. (: Anyway, Ace had work at 5:30 so we had to leave Val's house around 4 so he could get ready and so I could pick up my car, pick up my sister, and head home. So we went over to Ace's, I picked up my car, left, picked up my sister, talked a lot at Joghurt, and finally went home! Everything was pretty chill. Talked to BA about a lot of stuff, and eventually fell asleep. Around 10 I woke up to my co-worker, Andrew's, call. He was just concerned about the fact that I never called him one day when I said I would and we haven't seen each other since that day. Haha, it was nice of him to check up on me tho. Anyway, sometime around 10, Ace happened call and was on his way home when he decided to visit. Since my dad wasn't home, I asked my mom if he could come for a while and she was chill about it. Ace chilled at my house and we talked for like an hour or two, and he decided to go home. We sang a few songs, talked about our day, and ate strawberries. I then pasteled a few things after he left and went to sleep after a while. Great way to end a night again! Sweeeeeeeeet. (:
Saturday, May 16, 2009:
I woke up this morning, happily. Haha. I took a shower and went to Albertson's. I spent my morning conversating, running errands, and being happy. My sister, my brother, Chen, and I went over to an ice skating rink in Anaheim. (: It was my first time at an ice skating rink. It was tight tho! I got the hang of it 'cause I wasn't as scared as I was making myself think I was. Bahaha, so yeah. After skating for two hours, the kiddies and I headed back to West Covina. We dropped off Chen and went to buy my grandpa his Whopper Jr. and Frech Fries at Burger King. We then went home and now I'm here! Happy as can be! Hahaha.
By the way, being this happy slightly annoys me because I don't understand why I'm all of a sudden so energetic and I just seem to be bouncing off the walls. Harhar, maybe I'm just silly. So yeah, I finally updated! Harhar.
This song is stuck in my head:
Horoscope for Today:
Capricorn
You might want to reassert your control by downshifting for the curves ahead. You may even think about using the emergency brake to bring everything to a temporary standstill. Unfortunately, neither of these tactics will likely bring you the stability you seek. Furthermore, they could throw you into an unmanageable skid as your life seems to spin out of control. Fortunately, you are in no danger now if you simply go with the flow.
Simple thangs, chill hang outs, reminiscing, staying up, talk talk talking, little thangs.
And I'm doing just fine.
I seem to be back in the swang o' thangs! (:
Things are looking up.
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